Waiting In The Wings
by jennifergarnerfan
Summary: <html><head></head>Written for the Castle Fanfic Prompts over in Tumblr. AU 7.01 Castle wakes up in the hospital believing that Kate had been with him in the crash. He still cant remember his missing time, but when Kate is not immediately there, he begins to think that Kate did not survive the accident.</html>
1. Chapter 1

Written for the .com - prompts. Thought I might try and answer a few.

Anonymous asked:  
>AU 7.01 Castle wakes up in the hospital believing that Kate had been with him in the crash. He still cant remember his missing time, but when Kate is not immediately there, he begins to think that Kate did not survive the accident.<p>

Maybe 1/1. Oh. Forgive me. First fic. But don't let that deter you.

-  
>She stays outside the door, she doesn't know how long. It feels like a lifetime. She can hear his voice and Martha's hushed tones and the near hysterical whispered yelling of Alexis. She knows she should go in. She feels the desperation seeping from underneath the door and still she can't make her feet move. There's too much riding on this; too much expectation and far far too much hope. She knows that it's him; but just how much of him will be there?<p>

The door opens and the nurse steps out. They exchange looks, and the nurse moves away. She's still standing in the same place as she was when the nurse went in.  
>"It does get easier," the nurse comments as an afterthought, still moving away from Castle's room.<br>"Being here. It gets easier."  
>Kate looks up, the nurse nodding and smiling at her. Kate doesn't return the gesture and resumes her stare on the door.<p>

-  
>"Richard! Stop!"<br>"Dad! Calm down. Stop!"  
>"She's dead isn't she?! I need to see.. I need to get up..."<br>"Wait! Don't! You'll pull out the IV line."  
>"Dad!"<br>"Richard!"  
>The simultaneous yell of his name makes him stop and look at his ladies. He wishes there was one more though, yelling his third name.<br>"She was in the crash?" The question is left hanging. His damn eyes won't focus. He needs an answer but he can't focus on either woman.

The nurse comes in and they all fall silent. He thinks he sees her outside the door but she can't be here can she? She's gone. She's dead? His pitiful mind it just making him see what he wants to see most. The nurse quickly looks at his stats writes some things on his chart and gives him a smile.  
>"You're doing well Mr. Castle. You'll be out of here in no time."<br>He musters up the muscles in his face to smile back, but the creeping panic is coming back. It must show on the monitors because the gentle voice of his mother and daughter are whispering to him again. He doesn't take it in though, whatever they're saying. He hears the terms of endearment again and he hears her name. He hears words like 'dead' and 'okay' and he just can't make sense of it to put It together. The nurse comes back in and the ladies left in his life sit back in their chairs, relief on their faces. He knows his eyes are wide and his breathing is rapid but he can't stop. Panic? Is this what it was like for Kate? When she was shot? How many did she go through before she knew how to put herself back together? Will he get there? He feels himself drifting and the drugged feeling comes back, leading him into a dead sleep.

She brings herself to step through the threshold. Alexis gives her a death stare.  
>"Alexis?"<br>"Where were you?"  
>Martha moves so she can sit but Kate prefers to stand, taking a step closer to the girl.<br>"Alexis?"  
>She moves closer again. Sees the tear tracks. She looks over to Martha, who hasn't taken her eyes of Castle. Her eyes follow the stare and find that once they're there, she can't stop looking either.<br>The eyes of a detective look at him but the eyes of a lover look deeper and she feels it in her soul that no matter what, she won't be leaving this room, this life, this love without him.  
>And so she sits. And she takes his hand. And doesn't let go.<p> 


	2. Chapter 2

Last Chapter. Thanks for all those that have favourited, followed and commented. For the prompter at .com - I hope looks like what you wanted!

2/2

When he wakes up for the fifth or sixth time, he still believes she's a mirage. He's not quite willing to put stock in his eyes, his ears or his touch receptors. She has a hold of his hand still and he wants to reach out and touch her hair, her skin - anywhere really to make her real. But he's scared. As soon as he does he feels as though she'll just fade away.

He doesn't remember much. He does remember some things though. Vividly. Being held in a room, handcuffed to his bed (not as sexy as it sounds) and being moved to a dank cell and being roughed up a bit. The rest of the time is vague haze of drugs and concussion. Not fun and time he'd like to stay forgotten. He also remembers the voices. Mainly the one that tells him that Kate's dead.

'She's dead Mr Castle. Stop calling out for her. She's not coming for you.  
>'She's gone Mr. Castle.'<br>'Ms Beckett is dead.'

He opens his eyes again. She's still there. She's breathing too. When she looks up will it be her face or the face in his nightmares where she asks why he didn't save her? His breathing quickens, and he closes his eyes tightly.

If she's real maybe she'll respond to him squeezing her hand.. Maybe that's where he can start. He peeks through one eye and focus in their hands.

One finger. Two fingers. Squeeze.  
>Again.<br>One finger. Two fingers. Squeeze.  
>Breathe.<br>Wait.  
>Response..<br>She moves and he clamps his eyes shut. Please let it be real kate not dream kate.

"Rick?"  
>"Castle?"<br>"Babe? Open your eyes?"  
>He shakes his head, eyes still closed.<br>"Castle, open your eyes?" She implores, "It's ok babe. Everything is ok."  
>She rubs the back of his hand with her fingers and brings his hand to her lips. He feels it. It feels real. His breathing speeds up again. If he opens his eyes and she's not there, what is he going to do? But if he opens them and she is?<p>

He can still hear her taking, he's gotta stop doing that. Not listening zoning in and out, but sometimes it's so hard to hold attention.  
>Ok. Crunch time.<br>Taking a deep breath he opens his eyes.  
>"Hi." She whispers. "I've got you."<br>The sob that leaves his chest is so involuntary that he almost chokes.  
>"Hi." He can feel the tears rolling down his cheeks and he would blame it on the drugs but he doesn't know if he's on any. Come to think of it he doesn't even know why he's here. "It's really good to see you."<br>And suddenly she's crying too.  
>"You too."<p>

-  
>Two days she's been waiting for him to come to consciousness. Two days since she contemplated turning and hiding in her apartment instead of staying by his side like he would for her. Like he did for her almost two years ago.<p>

She's so tired. The first day was almost a 24 hour shift. With breaks only for the toilet- which he has in his room she hasn't been anywhere. Martha and Alexis relieved her on the second day as she hadn't seen daylight. She knows that his injuries aren't serious and their putting his lulls in consciousness down to drugs and his body healing itself, she just wants him awake. Maybe a small part of her just wants him to stay asleep and have everything status quo.

She's so tired. Her eyes keep closing and there's nothing she can do to stop it. She wishes. She doesn't know what she wishes, but if only things weren't so hard. She rests her head on the bed and takes his hand in hers.

Martha and Alexis have left; (Alexis to sort out school and Martha to sort out the Loft) so if course this is when Castle decides to wake up. She feels slight changes in the movements on the bed, and then she feels the squeeze, beat, squeeze of her fingers. She could cry. And then remembers she should respond.  
>Taking a firmer grasp of his hand, she calls out to him.<p>

"Rick?" Nothing. If anything his eyes close tighter. She can see the creases tighten.  
>"Castle?" Come on. Come on. She's running out of ideas. They've been through this a couple of times but usually the awake period hasn't involved him initiating the contact.<br>Once more. With feeling. Maybe a directive will help.  
>"Babe? Open your eyes?<p>

He shakes his head, eyes still closed. Oh crap. She feels like there's something deeper her. Something she's not quite understanding. Why isn't she better at this?

"Castle, open your eyes?" She implores, "It's ok babe. Everything is ok." Rubbing the back of his hand in what she hopes is a comforting gesture, she can't help but take him in and be so thankful that he's alive and here and the hope that has been sitting on her chest and heart is fit to burst. She brings his hand to her lips and hopes that it coveys everything. She's never been good at this. She feels his breathing speed up, placing a hand on his chest and feels his heart rabbiting.

"Castle. Open your eyes. I'm here, it's ok, you're ok, I'm ok." She's babbling and she knows it but it works. It works.  
>His eyes open.<br>"Hi."  
>Her hand moves up to his cheek.<br>"I've got you."  
>The sob that come from him nearly breaks her heart and then the tears that come after actually do and she breaks with them.<br>Finally she hears his voice.  
>"Hi," comes the low rumble of a voice she's dreamed of. She closes her eyes sighing deep. "It's really good to see you."<br>She feels the tears roll.  
>"You too."<p> 


End file.
